Ordo Ab Chao

With thanks to RedIssue.
I'm sure Johnny K will get a kick out of this.

• Theirry didn't use a new shaving blade and the drag factor slowed him down


• Lehmann's breakfast egg's over-cooked by 5 seconds causing him to fall heavily for the red card sending off. The Arsenal board will sue the hotel


• The coach taking them to the stadium was coloured green - which is bad luck


• Wenger: "Our players didn't get enough time to recover from the last game of the season" (two weeks ago)


• Wenger: "Unsettled future of Campbell, Cole and Henry unsettled the team spirit"


• Wenger: "The home advantage was clearily and unfairly in Barcelona's favour as Spain is closer to France than to England"


• Eboue didn't dive. The TV camera lens had a slight distortion on them making it seem that was. Eboue will be out injured next season


• The bright reflection from Eto's smiling teeth momentarily blinded Almunia for the first goal


• Campbell: "The second goal wouldn't have happened if the England manager had allowed Walcott to room with me. I've been worried to death about him rooming all on his own."


• Eboue: "It's about time the world footballing authorities did something about divers."